Trying to find an agent – Phase 2.

Trying to find an agent – Phase 2.

Today I e-mailed my first book to my second squad of agents. I use the term squad because I can’t help but feel like I am playing Fantasy Football when selecting agents. I actually used the phrase ‘Oh yeah, they didn’t make the cut the last time.’ I have a little scoring system too; like when you can’t pick a midfielder (for my North American friends, when you can’t decide between quarterbacks) and think well a: got a combined score of 3 but b: got 4, so they get in the team.

I was a lot calmer this time. The first time I sent my book to agents, I was so nervous that I could not physically type. I had to ask Gauri to send the e-mails for me. I simply sat there next to her shaking with nerves and gibbering incoherently. I am so lucky she still likes me. A neurotic writer trying to get his first book picked up by an agent cannot be a great proposition to live with.

It was easier this time. I think it becomes more a process, like filling in data on a computer screen. I forget what I am actually doing and just get the job done. I am not sure this is a good thing. Then again, it is all part of the process and I am learning this as I go along. 

I find it odd to pick agencies and agents. I really try and think ‘Who will work for me?’ Then, I also think that my gut is telling me  this, but my head is telling me that. It is like going on a date and you don’t know the person, but you are sure that you have to make the relationship work. They could be awful in the long run, but you really need them to be with you now. They are the one’s that can give birth to your little baby book, and unless you do the artificial insemination version of getting published and self-publish, you need them. Damn, that’s a frustrating idea. 

But then, they need us too right? With no books, agents do not have a lot to do. So, why is the situation so skewed in their favour? They can ask for exclusive reading periods, they can take months to respond or they might never respond. Would we take this treatment in real life? Ok, so I know we need agents as writers, but maybe, just maybe, we deserve to respect ourselves a little? I saw one agency asking for six weeks exclusive reading time. Who has six weeks to spare when not even another agent is looking at your book to wait for a 99% rejection rate? 

By the way. I am really not against agents. I want one. It is a dream of mine that completes my becoming an author fantasy. I want to have early morning meetings with coffee and croissants to discuss with my agent revisions, my next book, publicity tours etc. I just feel bummed out that I feel so deficient in their eyes. I have to do so much to gain their approval and they still might never even acknowledge me. I so want this relationship, but they might be ‘I am happy being single right now.’

So, I guess, I will just keep sending out my work in the hope that I catch an agent’s eye and they concede to coming on a date with me. I then hope to say the right thing, make witty comments and pick up the tab. Ok, I have completely lost where I was going with this analogy. This is the last time I blog on acid. Joke. I am just really drunk. Joke. I am merely squiffy… No, I am actually very squiffy.

Worst segue to an ending ever. (Seriously, I am laughing at how bad this is, but I can’t think of a better way).

Take care buddies,



About davidmbeecroft

Hello and welcome to my blog. Please feel free to have an explore. My name is David Beecroft. I am 38 years old. I co-founded and ran a small scale touring theatre company called Screwed & Clued in 1998. I went on to tour the Canadian Fringe Theatre Festival circuit over the following five years. I have written six original plays, the last ‘The Poe Show’ won a Best in Fest award at the 2014 Ottawa Fringe Festival. I worked in a social care setting for ten years and now work in a special needs school. I have sent my first novel off to agents and considering self-publishing if that does not work. I co-host a radio show on Surrey Hills Community Radio called Daves of the Week where we feature charities for a six week period. I live with my fiance and two pet Degus. I started this blog when suffering from depression and attending therapy, so a large part of this blog was about my experience and thoughts of that. Since then I am in a much better place and I write about life after depression and how I stay (or try to) ahead of it happening again. I also like to look at the happier sides of life and try to put a positive spin on serious subjects.

2 responses »

  1. Honestly and truly, I know the feeling of having that dream of a real agent and publisher. But my advice would be, if not to let it go entirely, to postpone it for a bit. Self-publishing can be wonderful for proving yourself so that you don’t feel so inferior when propositioning agents. Use it as a stepping stone to have a published work and sales records under your belt so you can show them your work is worth taking the risk to represent you. There’s nothing wrong with self-publishing if you’re smart about it and use it to your ultimate advantage.


    • Thank you so much Charlotte. That is super kind of you. I am starting to consider the self-publishing route, but, what can I say? I really want an agent. I am too stubborn too, so I want to get an agent if it kills me. I don’t think there is anything wrong with self-publishing. I just have specific vision of my dream of getting an agent and being a writer. Then again, if I never get an agent, I will be self-publishing’s biggest fan.

      Take care Charlotte.


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