The beach of the present and the waves of the past.

The beach of the present and the waves of the past.

I am sat on a beach that is the present. Everything is pleasant; the sky is blue, the sand is soft and a gentle breeze ripples across my skin. Life in the present is good. While I am thinking about life and all that it holds for me, the waves of the past come lapping slowly towards me. I become aware of them and move further back from the sea of memories. I remain in the present and my mind wanders again. Un-noticed, the waves come closer again and lost in my reverie, I do not move back from them. The waves pull me gently at first; a long forgotten summers day, a girl I had a crush on when I was five or the smell of freshly cut grass in the field behind the house I grew up in. Then the waves get stronger, more powerful and darker in nature. Before I know it, I am pulled far out to sea as memory after memory crashes down on me. It is in these moments that I believe time travel is possible. I exist in those past memories as realistically as the original experience. They can suffocate me with the feelings of things that happened more than half my life ago. I surface and catch my breath, try and swim back to the shore, but the undertow has me in its grip and will not let go. In the blue green world under the water, images and recollections of my life flash before my eyes as if I were drowning in reality. The choice is before me. Swim harder and faster than I ever have before or let my lungs fill with those memories and feel their salt water sting until I can breath no more. Upwards then. break the surface, swim for dry land and vomit up the past until I am cleansed of it. On dry land, in the present, I am who and what the past has made me. I am more than that however. I am who and what the past has made me with the knowledge that not everything that happened has been allowed to alter me, or if it did, then I am aware of that enough to reverse the process. The past has its pull to be sure, so I anchor myself in the present and look to the future when I can.

[Image retrieved from here]


About davidmbeecroft

Hello and welcome to my blog. Please feel free to have an explore. My name is David Beecroft. I am 38 years old. I co-founded and ran a small scale touring theatre company called Screwed & Clued in 1998. I went on to tour the Canadian Fringe Theatre Festival circuit over the following five years. I have written six original plays, the last ‘The Poe Show’ won a Best in Fest award at the 2014 Ottawa Fringe Festival. I worked in a social care setting for ten years and now work in a special needs school. I have sent my first novel off to agents and considering self-publishing if that does not work. I co-host a radio show on Surrey Hills Community Radio called Daves of the Week where we feature charities for a six week period. I live with my fiance and two pet Degus. I started this blog when suffering from depression and attending therapy, so a large part of this blog was about my experience and thoughts of that. Since then I am in a much better place and I write about life after depression and how I stay (or try to) ahead of it happening again. I also like to look at the happier sides of life and try to put a positive spin on serious subjects.

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