I have written a post on Moviepilot about my excitement about the upcoming The Killing Joke animated movie. Check it out onthe link below.
Let me say straight off the bat that this will contain spoilers, but not too many because the main point of this post is that I do not get what motivated the main characters in this movie. I will also say that I did not hate this movie in the same way a lot of people do. I have seen plenty of movies that were a lot worse.
My main issue with Batman v Superman is that nothing the main characters did made any sense to me. If any of them had seen a decent therapist for even one session, I think they all would have said ‘Oh, my whole reasoning is flawed and I won’t do what I had planned because it is (sorry, but I have to say this) Batshit crazy.’
I should also say that I avoided any pre-movie news or publicity, which I my way of saying that I did not know obvious things, so don’t be surprised if some of the things I am about to say seem dumb.
Final admission, I am coming at this with no real knowledge. It has simply been bothering me for a few days and I wanted to get it off my chest.
So. let’s start.
Lex Luthor Jnr (Or at least I think he is a Jnr).
I did not understand why this character did anything. At the start I did not even get that he was Lex Luthor. All I thought was Jimmy Olsen is acting a bit weird. He looked more like a Jimmy Olsen right? (Please see my explanatory comments about saying seemingly dumb stuff). I now understand that the character was meant to be Lex Luthor Jnr, but this is a problem in itself. Should a movie goer need to be fully up-to-date with movie news or DC lore to see a movie and have it make sense? Anyway, I digress.
In one scene, Lexie Jnr talks about how his dad beat him etc and grew up in poverty. Ok, fair enough. The jump from this to Superman must die is a leap that even Superman could not make. I am more than willing to say that I missed something, but I did not get an understanding of what Lex’s problem with Superman was. Or was it that Superman was too powerful and Lex was jealous? Or that Superman got it all too easy?
Why did Lex want Batman and Superman to fight if he was going to create Doomsday anyway? If you run a multi-billion dollar company like Lexcorp I would expect Lex to have a basic understanding of time-management and cost-reduction. The whole Batman plan took two years to put together and in the end it did not even work and he went with the Doomsday plan. Why not just cut to the chase and go straight to Doomsday? It is not like Lex cared about innocents dying or anything, so doesn’t it make more sense to go with the crazy strong Super-villain to begin with? Evil geniuses are not what they used to be.
There is something I have just thought of. Lex seemed bummed out that his Kryptonite was stolen by Batman. Maybe he did not know it was Batman who stole it, but shouldn’t he have wanted Batman to have it anyway if he wanted Batman to kill Superman? Lex could have just had the following conversation with Batman.
L: ‘Hey Batman, we both hate Superman right?’
L: ‘Want some Kryptonite so you can kick his ass?’
B: ‘Sounds good.’
This is my main problem with what Lex did. Why did he not give the cute Asian PA the day off instead of sending her to be blown up at the Superman hearing? Good PA’s are hard to find and she was super cute, so why not send her to do some photocopying or something? It was not like she was integral to the bombing plan. Dick move Lex.
One more thing on Lex, but I guess this is not totally his fault. Why did they shave his head at the end? Did he have lice? Was it a lice thing? Or did they think ‘Hey his Dad was bald, so maybe we should shave his head so he looks more like his Dad?’ That is some pretty messed up reasoning there Mr Prison Guard.
Did she spend most of the movie trying to get her hands on a photo of herself from 1918? Why bother? Who would care? She could have said it was photoshopped. Or deflected attention by saying ‘Hey, wait, I might be old, but what about this Superman guy who is going around trashing cities. Let’s hate on him instead.’
This is something my brother mentioned, but why didn’t they give Wonder Woman the Kryptonite spear and let her kill Doomsday? She was doing well enough with her regular sword and shield. Imagine how well she could have done if she had a weapon made of something that Doomsday was really, really allergic too? Batman and Superman could have called it a day and gone for a cup of tea and a scone.
Was it me or did Superman just mope around and be a complete downer in this movie? I am not letting the fact that I hate Superman cloud my judgement here (Tee hee, I totally am) but I wanted someone to slap him and say ‘Cheer up. People might hate you, but what are they going to do about it? Fly to another planet and take a break. Or, have some cake to feel better. Just lose that stupid face you are pulling in every scene.’ Superman is a twat. At this point I think it is fair to say I wouldn’t have cared if Superman’s motivations made sense.
As you may have guessed, the main reason I wanted to see this movie was to see Batman punch Superman in his super stupid face. I loved The Dark Knight Returns graphic novel, where this movie stems from. The difference is that the graphic novel was awesome and the movie managed to take all the best ideas and throw them in a hole in the ground instead of using them.
In the graphic novel, Superman was sent to kill Batman and Batman was up for that fight for many reasons I won’t go into now. In the movie Batman wanted to kill Superman because…err…Superman destroyed one his buildings or something? Bruce Wayne is a billionaire so he had lots of other buildings or could have built new ones. Batman destroyed a bunch of buildings in the Batwing and Batmobile, but he did not seem to be bothered about it. The same goes for Batman hating Superman because people died when Superman fought Zod. Batman killed a bunch of people too, so hypocritical doesn’t even come close.
Batman said a few time that ‘Superman could burn this whole planet to the ground.’ so he has to die. Pretty extreme reasoning there. Anyone who is a threat to the human race must die. Taken to an extreme logic, this could equate to potentially everyone is a threat to the human race, so everyone must die. I have this image of Batman being the last person alive and thinking ‘At least there are no more threats to the human race now.’
As bizarre as Batman’s reasons for hating Superman are they are nowhere near as weird as his sudden reason for not hating him. The whole fight to the death thing was ended because Batman found out Superman’s mum had the same name as his mum. Seriously. I have seen the movie and I can’t believe what I have just written.
Flip this reasoning. Superman must die because he is a threat to the human race. Batman makes the decision not kill him because their mum’s share the same name. The survival of the human race is less important than mum’s sharing a name. I think the idea was that Batman realises that Superman can’t be all that bad because he has a mum and his mum has the same name as Batman’s mum, so he is probably a good guy. This makes no sense. The name of the mother has no bearing on how the child turns out one way or the other.
I know none of this is real, and I am taking it all way too seriously, but I really wanted to love this movie. This is my getting over it. My therapy to deal with a sucky film. As I said, if they had all gone to a good therapist… Actually, if Zack Snyder had gone to a therapist with this movie idea, hopefully they would have said ‘Do not make this movie. You are thinking crazy right now.’
So, I am coming to the end of this idea as I am running out of ideas. I hope it has helped someone, or made people smile at least. So, here are three more ways that ideas from computer games can help tackle depression.
Much like Batman and his trusty Bat-Belt, which is helping me through the next hardest instance of Batman: Arkham Origins there are a few gadgets out there that can help ease you through a depressive period. You can also use gadgets that are not intended for the purpose of fighting depression in different ways.
One thing I did was set reminders on my phone to give me a little pick me up and boost general confidence. I would set a little message to pop up in a few days to cheer myself up. I have a rubbish memory so I often forgot about them by the time I got them. My usual message was ‘Dear David. You Rock! Lots of love, David.’ I would read them and think ‘Aw, that was nice of me.’
There are a host of relaxation or mediation apps out there and some very good ones can be had for free. I really like Dr Monica Frank, but there are enough that you can pick and choose. Ten minutes of relaxation can really take the stress out of a day and help you deal with situations more calmly.
Finally, chart your depression on your phone. I recorded when depression would hit and if there was anything obvious that led to it or made it worse. from this, I was able to learn that there were certain triggers that I could later either be ready for and expect or avoid altogether.
Now, the last idea segued into this idea so neatly, it was almost like I planned it. If you, like me, have spent a lot of time trying to figure out dastardly clever puzzles from the Resident Evil games, you know how vexing they can be. Yet, the pride in solving them without using the internet is immense. Once you have charted your depression, you can start trying to figure out the puzzle of depression. Or try to. As with many of my ideas, I believe there is a certain strength that can be found when you actively try and take control of depression. It may not work at first, or at all, but it feels good to be on the front foot and try and beat it, rather than letting it have it all its own way. Look for links to what makes you down, think how you can make your life easier. Each person’s depression is unique to them, so you will have to do the ground work. I believe it will be helpful when you do.
Ask The Village Elders For Advice on Your Quest.
Invariably in an RPG, I will get lost or plain forget what it is that I am doing. I need advice. Who to go to? Easy, there is always a village elder who can give some advice, even if it is needlessly cryptic, about how to get past the next challenge of my quest. I personally believe that talking to a therapist is a great way to ask for help in tackling your depression. They can guide you past the choppy waters. Also, asking your friends for help can be comforting. I asked my friend the other day if he ever got angry for no reason and then angrier for getting angry for no reason? He said ‘Of course.’ It easy to think that what you think is crazy and no-one else feels the same. Simply by asking a question, it can be a relief to find out that you are far from the only person who thinks a certain way. It really can help alleviate the loneliness of feeling no-one can help you or advise you. There is a comfort in simply sharing your fears; once you get over the fear of talking about it at all.
If you have any of your own ideas on how computer games can help tackle depression, then please feel free to share and comment.
Take care buddies,
So, I have had a few more ideas about this. I say a few, I mean a lot. I will share a few today and more in the days to come.
Get A Companion.
In World of Warcraft, you can get a host of companions to travel by your side. My favourite was Mr Pinchy because it was the same as the lobster Homer Simpson had for a pet before eating him. So, in real life, get a pet. A pet can help improve mild and moderate depression. I have two pet Degus (Chilean ground squirrels) and when I am feeling a little down, I go over and teach them to high five me,or as I call it, ‘Paw on Paw.’ It does make me feel happier. The good thing about a pet is that I find easier to be down in front of a pet than my girlfriend or my friends. I don’t feel the same level of social embarrassment. Besides, as long as I am feeding them they don’t seem to mind either way. I will one day get a dog, and that will be the best.
Clean Out Your Inventory.
Again with World of Warcraft, you always hit a stage where you are miles from anywhere and all your bags are full. I ended up trashing grey items to make space rather than running back to the nearest town. The days before they gave you a mount at low levels were a bugger. So, today, I did a good old clean of my flat. I find it is soothing for me to clean and helps me clear space in my flat and more importantly, space in my head. It is a kind of mental de-cluttering. Give it a go. Throw out old clothes. Treat yourself to some new ones. If you, like me, have little money, charity shops are for the win.
Rethink The Encounter.
Rather than repeatedly run at Bane when he is super-charged with Venom when playing as Batman in Arkham Origins, I perhaps should have considered a different tactic. As he was constantly punches me to death, then just perhaps, it is worth avoiding him. If something is not working for you in real life, reconsider how you are doing it. I was on anti-depressants for ages that were making me so much worse. It took me a long time even realise that I could say to my doctor ‘I don’t think these are working for me.’ I mean, he was the doctor and was just this depressed person. Who was I to question him? The answer is I was the one on the medication and I was the one who knew exactly how they were not helping me. The doctor even said ‘Sometimes it is a lottery to find the right tablets that work for each individual.’
More advice to come in due course.
Take care buddies,
I am laying down as I am writing this to stop the room from spinning. I have the mother of all hangovers but I am a brave little soldier so I will manfully carry on.
We had a great time at the Virgin Care party.
We arrived and I skilfully put the tent up with no instructions. Actually there were instructions but I didn’t see them until this morning as unskilfully put the tent away.
Then Gauri did my face so I was all pretty.
See? How pretty am I? I went for the third eye design as I thought it might give me psychic powers. It did not or I would have known how I was going to feel and I would not have drunk as much.
We had Cypriot kebabs. Gauri had chicken. I had Haloumi cheese. The hot sauce was Hawt! There were three ladies on stilts. How they did not fall over walking over a lumpy field is amazing. One lady danced better on stilts than I do off them.
Then we started to drink. They had a weird system where you had to buy tokens in order to buy drinks. I am not sure why. The cocktails were great. Well, they were yesterday. Today I hate them for what they have done to me.
They had human fusball. We cheered a lady who kept making saves with her breasts. And then we laughed at a lady next to us who got hit by the football.
We went on the dodgems and then I got over my extreme fear of heights and went on the chair swing. It was only ten foot high but still it was super scary. I managed to let my death grip on the chains go and stuck my arms out and sang ‘My Heart Will Go On.’
Then it all gets a bit blurry. We met someone who deals with infected penises. We danced. Gauri had an entire pot of golden glitter poured over her. We ate burgers. We met strangers who became friends. The music was awesome.
At some point I ‘acquired’ a black poncho and ran around like Batman, swishing my cape dramatically and shouting ‘I am the night’.
The last thing I remember was chatting to people about my writing and my book. Then I woke up with my shoes still on. Hardcore!
We packed at went to Oxford for Gauri’s favourite falafel wrap. Seriously, she was more excited about the wrap than the party. Mine is in the fridge as I can’t face eating anything.
Now I am off to lie down and watch Supernatural.
Take care buddies,
So, I got too excited yesterday about the Liebster Award and asked and answered my own questions, rather than wait for Kirsten to get back to me. Seeing as Kirsten is my favourite person right now, I wanted to answer the questions she sent. So, here we go.
Oh, and you can visit Kirsten on her site on the link below. Please do visit and shower her with love and all things good.
1. Fave author and why?
Terry Pratchett because he is the best and has been for over 30 years.
2. Fave book?
Oh jeez. Just one book? I can’t say the one I wrote can I? The Remains of the Day.
3. Who is your hero?
Batman, but only the graphic novels. Not the film. Screw you Chris Nolan.
4. If you could have a conversation with anyone; who would it be and why?
P.G Wodehouse. I love this guy. One of the funniest writers I have ever read.
5. What one question would you like an answer to – that Google cant provide?
Justin Bieber’s popularity.
6. If you had a time machine where would you go/why?
To the beginning of time so I can end the ‘did the big bang happen or not debate’ once and for all.
7. If you could marry a celebrity; who would you choose/why?
Selena Gomez in order to piss off Bieber.
8. If you could be a fictional character, which one would you choose/why?
Dream from the Sandman graphic novels. He has a library of every book never finished and I would love that.
9. If you could only have one super power; what would you choose/why?
Mind control, so I can get a friggin agent.
10. Where is your favorite holiday city/location/country?
11. If you were Bruce Almighty and had God’s power for a day; what would you change? Remember; you cant affect free will (force love etc).
I would make homophobes gay for a day to mess with their minds.