So, I have been thinking about a few things this week. They all pretty much centre around ‘how to be’ in this modern world of ours. I have been oscillating between two extremes in terms of points of view. If someone upsets me for instance, I go from ‘Screw them. That’s why you don’t help people.’ to ‘Well, they might have been upset about something else, so I better not judge them and they are probably more in need of sympathy because of it.’ I tie myself up in knots trying to see things from other people’s point of view and react accordingly. It is bloody exhausting and I never seem to know what is the right thing to do in the end.
I wondered if there is such a thing as hyper self-awareness. It seems that there is. I feel almost painfully aware of how others might be feeling and probably cause myself emotional harm in doing it all the time, even to the extent that I would rather defend someone who is blatantly in the wrong that have them feel bad for being wrong. This sounds silly as I type it.
As a result, I am thinking where to find my middle ground. The more I thought about it, the more simple it seemed to me. Well, in theory anyway. I have tended to have problems with putting good ideas into practise. However, I shall endeavor to keep trying. It seems to me to boil down to finding a sensible place between two opposites.
Be honest but not cruel. Be thick skinned but remain kind inside. Be helpful but don’t be a doormat. Be confident yet not arrogant. Be generous but don’t give everything away. Be passionate but not overbearing. Know the difference between banter and venom. (The last one is a throwback to my high school days, but I think it stands the test of time).
As I said, it seems simple enough. Now to go and try to put into practise.
Take care buddies,
David.
Very good analysis of what si many struggle with. I strive to take the zrn approach. and ‘eat when hungry, sleep when tired’. Thete is no definitive right or wrong because to try and make one creates a life souly based on paradigm….what fun would that be?
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Thanks David. Maybe I am too anal as not knowing right or wrong for sure leaves my stomach feeling like I have eaten too many sour grapes. Ah, word play is fun 🙂
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Taking the time to evaluate how others might be feeling in a given situation is a rare and laudable attribite. Too few people bother, so I think it’s probably better to fall farther on the too much side than the not enough side.
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Hmm. I hadn’t thought about it being a rare thing to do. That’s an interesting point. Thank you.
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